Ivan’s
beard had grown back full and frizzy and thick, and he was glad of it. Last
winter the weather was so mild that he kept it trimmed close to his face, much
to the happy surprise of his mother. Normally, however, he kept it bushy during
the colder months, much to the delight of his girlfriend Leila.
They
met during the big blizzard of 2011. Snowmageddon, Snowpocalypse, whatever
other foreboding portmanteau you wanted to call it. Nobody had to go to work,
so Ivan’s friend Greg invited a bunch of people over to get snowed in together.
Ivan walked in the door, ice nestled into every curl of his beard. Leila walked
right up to him.
“You
must be Jack Frost.”
He
set the handle of whiskey he’d brought on the ground. “Sorry to disappoint you.
I’m Ivan.”
“Leila.
I’m Greg’s cousin.”
“Oh,
cool.”
She
reached out and stroked his face. The snowflakes melted on her fingertips. “I
like your beard. It’s frutescent.”
“What
the hell does that mean?”
“It
means ‘shrub-like in appearance.’ They actually took it out of the dictionary a
few years ago, which is a shame. It’s a great word. Honestly, I’m really
excited that I got to use it properly in a sentence.”
“Glad
I could help. So is that a compliment then?”
“Yeah,
I’d say it is.”
“Good.
I’m a sucker for flattery. Want a drink?”
A winter love story for this snowy day. Seriously, it looks like I'm in a snow globe. It's awesome.
FRUTESCENT! It's right up there with callipygian and pulchritudinous :)
ReplyDeleteDamn right.
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