Thursday, September 27, 2012


Seen getting on the Brown Line to Kimball at about 8:15 a.m.

I can’t believe she told me I couldn’t work. That it’s not a proper lady’s place. Well guess what? Last time I checked, a princess gets to do what she wants. So what if her-royal-highness-my-mother orders me not to? What’s she going to do? Disown and disinherit me? Good. I didn’t ask to be a member of this ridiculous secret monarchy anyway.

They’re all in denial. Do they really think that, in a time of crisis, the American people are really just going to let them swoop in and take power? Yeah, right. Frightened people will do a lot of things they might not otherwise do; frightened Americans, however, would probably just cling desperately to the ideal of Democracy and pull out their shotguns. What will my parents do then? How will my always-perfect little sister Gloria handle her bloody fate? I don’t want any part of that.

All I want is to be a normal person. I want to live in a shitty apartment with cockroaches. I want to hook up with a complete stranger that I met at a bar. I want a job that will scar and blister my pale, immaculate hands

This story will probably not make any sense unless you read this story first. I invented America's secret monarchy in May of last year. Can't believe it was that long ago.

I think some of my fellow DWChitown members and I are going to The Whistler tonight for The Minus Times release party. Fancy drinks. Readings. Who could ask for more?  

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