Wednesday, May 16, 2012


Seen waiting for the Red Line to 95th at about 8:30 a.m. 

“Leggings aren’t pants.”

Shrill giggling.

In a whisper: “She probably can’t fit a pair of jeans over that ass!”


I can’t believe that just happened. I can’t believe some skinny white bitches from DePaul had the nerve to say that to me. Or to anyone, for that matter. And they weren’t even drunk! At least, I hope they weren’t drunk this early in the morning. I guess it wouldn’t surprise me that much.

Fact is, I love my ass. I want to show it off all the time. It’s like a perfect round globe, and my muscly legs are Atlas. It’s like a soft pillow; it cushions wherever I sit. And when I dance, this booty shakes like nothing you’ve ever seen. It’s beautiful to behold, a natural wonder of the world. Bitches are just jealous that their bland, two-by-four plank bodies blend into the background. They are forgettable. They’ll never pop like me.  

Today is National Flash Fiction Day in the UK! I don't know why we don't have one in the U.S., but I'm going to celebrate anyway. Here are some flash fiction blogs I like (all of which can be found on my "Links" page):
Also, you have LESS THAN TEN DAYS to vote PTKY as "Best Local Blog" in the Chicago Reader's Best of Chicago 2012 Contest! It's in the "Civic Life" section. All the cool kids are doing it.

1 comment:

  1. Are jeggings pants? I hope so because they are the only pants I wear.

    Thanks for linking to my blog! You've inspired me to post today. And I wrote a SLIGHTLY LONGER one. Big deal.


Please leave a comment! It always makes my day.