Wednesday, February 8, 2012


Seen on the Red Line to 95th at about 2:10 p.m.

It all began with her feet: they started to shrink a few weeks ago. Carrie-Anne thought it strange when her favorite shoes wouldn't stay on. At first they were simply loose, soon they flopped off with each step. On her way home from work that day she stopped at a Payless and bought some smaller pairs. Thank God for BOGO sales, she thought.

She got really nervous when she got home and slipped off her socks; her toenails had grown over the bump of her cuticles, and the keratin was edging up towards the center of her feet. She googled her symptoms but couldn't find anything like it. She didn't want to go to a doctor, for a doctor might confirm her greatest fear--that she was completely insane.

Over the next few days, Carrie-Anne's feet became hard and small. Her toes melded together, and her heels thickened. Meanwhile, the blood drained from her legs. They became white and soft, and dainty patterns emerged where the blue maps of her veins used to be. She couldn't understand what was happening until she went to see The Woman in Black with one of her friends. The film starts with three Victorian children having a tea party in their nursery, and Carrie-Anne suddenly realized that her legs closely resembled those of one of the guests. "Porcelain doll!" she gasped. Several of the other theater patrons shushed her.

Now she stares down at the symptoms of her disease. Delicate, white, lacy high-heeled shoes cover her delicate, white feet; thick white lines weave back and forth, back and forth, all the way up her white tights. Legs? It is a disease, she knows that now. Once Carrie-Anne was certain that she was turning into a doll, she returned to the internet, and she fortunately stumbled upon Dr. Elwood's website. He treats people like her, people morphing into toys. His website has pictures and success stories. A boy with plasticizing arms and a growing affinity for camouflage--saved from his G.I. Joe fate by Dr. Morton Elwood's Miracle Tonic! A woman with an increasingly puffy stomach, a rapidly diminishing nose, and tufts of brown fur sprouting all over her body--cured of her teddy bear transformation by Dr. Morton Elwood's Amazing High-Frequency Electric Corset!

Carrie-Anne knows how ridiculous it all sounds, but at this point Dr. Elwood is her only hope. She's currently on her way to his south-side office. He has to help her, and quickly! Her hips and abdomen are already a bit harder, her cheeks a bit rosier, her eyes a bit bluer. She already feels a little less human.

Hey all. Red Line today! I always try to write stories when I don't ride the Purple Line, because I take that one most frequently. Anyway, time for some Wednesday night fun. Meeting my friend Meg at Native Foods for dinner, then heading up to Andersonville for karaoke with the roommate. Sometimes I think I do too many things...

Did you notice the new site design? Moved all those blogs/musicians/artists/projects that you should DEFINITELY check out to a brand new Links page! It looks so much cleaner now. I've been meaning to do that for a while. Did you also notice that PTKY has a tumblr now? Now all those of you who frequent the tumblr universe can reblog my stories anytime you want. :) I'll also be posting other things I like on there. You know...generally doing the whole tumblr thing. Whatever that is. I'll figure it out. 

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